Ed Wood Wednesdays, week 50: "Meatcleaver Massacre" (1977)

Believe it or not, this poster actually does sort of summarize the plot of Meatcleaver Massacre.

catholic [kath-uh-lik, kath-lik]  

adjective

1. broad or wide-ranging in tastes, interests, or the like; having sympathies with all; broad-minded; liberal. 
2. universal in extent; involving all; of interest to all.
3. pertaining to the whole Christian body or church.

Ed's 1977 novel.

What might Ed Wood have given for the opportunity to direct a non-porno movie in 1977? His situation was exceptionally grim that year, with his only known creative output being a single transvestite-themed paperback, TV Lust (billed as "The Fictional Memoirs of One of America's Best-Known Drag Queens"), for a publisher called Eros Goldstripe, which had previously released his novels Forced Entry and Diary of a Transvestite Hooker in 1974. Thwarted projects from that period include Shoot 7, an unproduced musical about the St. Valentine's Day Massacre, and Venus de Milo, a proposed film vehicle for Ed's nascent punker neighbor Shannon Dolder involving a search for the missing arms of the titular statue.

As intriguing as Shoot 7 and Venus de Milo sound, such never-to-be endeavors clearly do not pay the bills. Eddie was broke, drunk, in showbiz exile, utterly lacking direction, and only a year away from his untimely death. So seedy and crime-ridden were his surroundings that he lived in a state of constant fear and paranoia, a situation that served to exacerbate his racial and ethnic prejudices. There were even times when, according to his wife Kathy, Ed pawned his typewriter -- his only conceivable source of future income, mind you -- to pay for booze. All he really had left with which to bargain by then was his immortal soul.

Under those circumstances, Ed Wood might have made a tempting mark for Mephistopheles. Had the Horned One come knocking on the door of Eddie's squalid Yucca Street apartment in Hollywood, clutching a sheaf of parchment, would Eddie have affixed his name in blood to the cursed document? Would he have even flinched?

I ask these questions because of the strange, occult-themed movie that serves as our focal point this week. Though I had never even heard of it until a few months ago, the title kept recurring with regularity throughout the course of my Wood-ian inquiries. Which books and movies do you cover and which do you ignore in a series such as this?

There are definite, identifiable levels of orthodoxy in Ed Wood scholarship and journalism. Some ultra-strict observers limit themselves to the six feature films he wrote and directed under his own name between 1953 (Glen or Glenda?) and 1960 (The Sinister Urge). Most will at least allow for the films he wrote under his own name in the 1950s and 1960s (The Violent Years, Orgy of the Dead, Bride of the Beast, etc.). Heartier explorers will make room in their lives for the softcore and hardcore pornographic films Ed wrote and/or directed in the 1970s, some of which (like The Snow Bunnies and Fugitive Girls) were even done under his own name.

But then, my friends, there is a whole world of speculative Wood work: projects Eddie may have, might have, could have, sort of, supposedly, allegedly, or probably worked on. What does one do with such movies? I grew up in the Catholic faith, a religion whose very name means "all-encompassing," and I have taken an appropriately catholic approach to Ed Wood's filmography and bibliography. Certainly, some of what I cover will be fool's gold. But to neglect these auxiliary films is to potentially miss a large -- perhaps even the largest -- chunk of Eddie's career. Eddie labored in Hollywood for 30 years, and for much of that time he was an undocumented worker.

My job, then, is to do some documenting. Let's proceed.