G is for Ghost (Day 7)

I saw a scary ghost.

"Phoning it in" is such an integral part of the creative process that not even children are immune. Witness this page of My Halloween Dictionary. I vaguely remember that this booklet was created over a period of several school days, and we had an hour per day to work on it. After comparatively elaborate pages for E and F, I must have felt I was behind schedule when I got to G -- hence a nondescript white character against a blank white background. Voila! Another page completed! I do like that Mr. Ghost feels compelled to say "boo" (after all, that's what ghosts say, right?) even when no one else is around.

F is for Frankenstein (Day 6)

Frankenstein is very scary.

Or "Frankinstein." Whatever. And before you mention it, yes, I know that "Frankenstein" is the name of the doctor, not the monster. In fact, I wrote a song all about it, sung to the tune of "Frankenstein" by the Edgar Winter Group.



Frankenstein is the doctor's name, not the monster's name!
(The monster didn't have a name.)
Frankenstein is the doctor's name, not the monster's name!
I get annoyed when I hear people say
Boris Karloff played Frankenstein
When, in reality, that role was played by Colin Clive.
Don't people know that the name Frankenstein
Just refers to the doctor?
Why is it used indiscriminately to refer to the monster?
Why... can't... folks ever get the names straight?
Can... they... change or is it too late?
Frankenstein is the doctor's name, not the monster's name!
(It really isn't difficult!)
Frankenstein is the doctor's name, not the monster's name!

E is for Exciting (Day 5)

Halloween is exciting.

Now that's what I'd call truth in advertising! A child dressed as a witch being attacked by an actual bear as the stars themselves rain down from Heaven? I'd say that qualifies as "exciting." Perhaps, though, that creature is meant to be a werewolf. After all, the moon is full in this picture. I was a kid, so who knows what was going on in my mind? Under the circumstances, I'd say the child/witch is being fairly zen, opting merely to say the word "help" (to the monster, I guess?) rather than run away. And notice that she has the presence of mind to hold onto her candy. Werewolf or not, one has to keep one's priorities straight.

D is for Dracula (Day 4)

Dracula is a vampire.

The problem with labels is that they're so reductive. I mean, sure, Dracula is a vampire. But does the word "vampire" contain the whole of his being? Can anyone be reduced to a single word? Perhaps Dracula is also a connoisseur of fine wines or an avid cribbage player as well. But you'd never know that from this entry. Oh, well. I'd like to point out the multi-media nature of this mid-1980s project: pencil, crayon, and marker are freely and daringly intermingled.

C is for Costume (Day 3)

I have a scary costume.

To me, this costume says "baffling" more than "scary," but I suppose we are afraid of things we don't understand so I'll allow it. I'd characterize this being as a demonic donkey alien, complete with mismatched thigh-high boots. In retrospect, I'm amazed that I didn't go with the more obvious "candy." That's definitely the Family Feud "fast money" answer in this situation, right?

B is for Bat (Day 2)

I saw a vampire bat.

See? Already things are getting better. If you examine this drawing carefully, you can see that my 7-year-old self already knew the meaning of "artistic compromise," as the word Bats has been altered to read simply Bat. I imagine I drew the first bat and thought, "To hell with this. I'm not drawing a second one." Also, please note the similarity between this monstrosity and DC's Man-Bat. Precognition?

And, yes, I'm aware that lego Man-Bat has a monster wang.

A is for Apple (Day 1)

I got an apple on Halloween.

Okay, so My Halloween Dictionary gets off to a rather dull, conventional start with this entry. Trust me, it gets better. This is a reminder that there was a time when you could think of "apples" and "Halloween" and not immediately think "razor blades." Full disclosure: I did not get an apple on this or any Halloween. Plenty of razor blades, though.

New October Project! My Halloween Dictionary

The cover of My Halloween Dictionary.

Hello, one and all!

While rummaging through my vast archives in a fit of Citizen Kane-esque nostalgia, I discovered a remarkable artifact: a project I did in elementary school, circa age 8! It's a little booklet entitled My Halloween Dictionary. As a way of gearing up for Halloween itself, I've decided to share this golden oldie with you a page at a time... along with some contemporary commentary from an older, wiser perspective. And feel free to add any comments of your own. Above is the front cover. Stay tuned for more! A new page will be posted each day for the rest of the month.

Below is the inside front cover with comments by my third grade teacher, Mrs. Maki. (Which is pronounced just like the last name of the guidance counselor on South Park.)

Comments by my third grade teacher.