Ed Wood Wednesdays: The Wood Loop Odyssey, Part 16 by Greg Dziawer

The flavor of the week is cherry, according to Greg.

My quest to document Edward D. Wood, Jr.'s work in 1970s pornographic loops continues this week. I recently delved into a silent subtitled 8mm loop called "Super Stud" starring John Holmes, the first in the short-lived Pussycat Films series. This week, I'm detailing the second loop in that series, "Kookies & Creamm," giving you the highlights and transcribing the subtitles.

The film begins with the usual spinning "Adult Cinema presents" graphic, but the print I viewed had no title card beyond that.

In the opening shot, two young ladies walk down a sunny SoCal sidewalk. We cut to a man on an interior set, talking on a black rotary phone. He's wearing a very wide tie, shorthand for him being a "horny business executive," as he is described in the crude box cover summary for the loop.

A summary of the film.

Next to this man—portrayed by Ric Lutze, the male lead in the 1971 Ed Wood-written-and-directed porn feature Necromania—is a bulbous yellow table lamp, a familiar set decoration in loops produced by the Bloom family. And Ric is wearing a white and grey striped dress shirt, seemingly identical to the one worn by John Holmes in numerous such loops, including "Big (14 Inch) Surprise," the ninth entry in the Fanny Films series. 

Since "Kookies & Creammm," "Big (14 Inch) Surprise," and Necromania were all filmed at the same Santa Monica Blvd. studio belonging to talent agent and cinematographer Hal Guthu, could it even be the very same shirt from wardrobe?

Some very unusual hair bows!

In any event, our horny business executive hangs up the phone and gets up to answer the front door. In medium close-up, we see the two young ladies from the sidewalk. Although they wear different dresses—one green and one red—they both don the same berets with an insignia on the front. And though it's an easy detail to miss, each lady has a pair of green bows in her pigtailed hair... and by "bows," I mean the type meant for wrapping Christmas presents! So our two young ladies arrive literally gift wrapped for Ric Lutze! The cheapness of the bows, meanwhile, further contributes to the "school play" aesthetic of the production.

Knowing where this encounter will lead, the film's first subtitle is likely a pun.

Girls: WANT OUR COOKIES? 

Ric: LET'S SEE WHAT THEY LOOK LIKE.

Characteristic of the earliest silent loops circa 1972-1973, all three performers mouth far more dialogue than is communicated in the subtitles. The girls do have cookies in a paper shopping bag. The pair walk into and away from the camera, one efficient edit transporting them from the front door to the couch on the interior set. This is a signature trope seen in dozens of related loop series and hundreds of individual films, including the best-known franchise of them all, Swedish Erotica, which entered the 8mm home market in 1973, just after Pussycat Films.

But back to the subtitles:

Blonde Girl: I LOVE TO SUCK LOLIPOPS. 

Hmmm...another pun?

As the trio sit on the couch and sample the cookies, a cut to another angle reveals a large white skull in the foreground on the coffee table in front of the couch. The skull is positioned so that it faces away from the couch and toward the camera, its large and hollow eye sockets staring directly at us!

A skull adds an eerie touch to this scene.

The subtitles continue.

Blonde Girl: HOW ABOUT THIS LOLIPOP?

The inevitable threesome ensues, punctuated by subtitles and set against an assortment of highly familiar props recycled throughout the larger family of loops. There are recognizable lamps, for instance, plus a green shag carpet and a curtained wall behind the couch. As often happens in these films, the girls sport heavy powder-blue mascara and keep their black stockings and garters on throughout the tryst. The berets and Christmas bows, likewise, remain on their heads the whole time.

We then cut to a medium shot fully revealing the coffee table in front of the couch. The white skull stares vacantly at us from the center of the table, a thick hardcover dictionary next to it. At either end of the table sit a pair of Chinese Guardian Lions, as seen in Necromania, the Ed Wood-written-and-directed porn feature The Young Marrieds, and dozens of related loops. The lions, though facing different directions from each other, both look away from us.

Blonde Girl: HOW ABOUT A SNACK AT YOUR SNATCH? 

Brunette Girl: THE CHERRY IS MUCH DEEPER. 

Ric: WHAT A JUICY CUNT! 

Brunette Girl: STICK YOUR LOLIPOP IN MY CUNT. 

Blonde Girl: STIR IT LIKE A CHERRY SODA. 

Ric: TAKE IT ALL THE WAY DOWN YOUR THROAT. 

Ric: SUCK ME DRY...SUCK IT...SUCK IT. [Characteristic repetition with ellipses]

Ric: I'M COMING...I'M COMING. [Same]

Ric: SWALLOW IT GIRLS. 

Blonde Girl: GIVE ME SOME TOO. 

Blonde Girl: UMMMMMMMMMMM GOOD.

The girls quickly dress and beat a hasty retreat.

THE END

As with the preceding loop in the series, "Super Stud," "Kookies & Creammm" is rife with correspondences to the larger series of loops. For the record, there are 15 lines of subtitles, which is fairly sparse for a silent loop of this vintage. In total, there are 74 words onscreen, an average of 4.93 words per line.  That's above the median, with the subtitles atypically consisting of mostly full sentences, rather than the usual UMMMMM's and AHHH's.

Notably, as the author of these subtitles, Ed sticks to the larger metaphor, i.e. candy and other sugary delights. How sweet it is! Any additional involvement by Ed Wood in the making of this loop, such as directing or editing, remains speculative. However, those distinctive Christmas bows strongly suggest—to me, at least—his larger presence.