Monday, December 23, 2024

2024 Comics Fun Advent Calendar, Day 23: Even more Batman ones

"No jellybeans? But isn't this Easter Island?"

Batman. The Dark Knight. The Caped Crusader. The World's Greatest Detective. Whatever you may call him, he's been appearing in comics since 1939 and has crossed over to every possible medium since then. After so many decades of TV shows, movies, video games, and merchandise, is there anything left to say about this character? Probably not. But that hasn't stopped me from trying. I have a bunch of old, unposted Batman comics and cartoons left over on my computer, so I thought we'd just blitz through all of them in one post.

Ready? Then let's proceed. You wanna get nuts? Come on! Let's get nuts!

Sunday, December 22, 2024

2024 Comics Fun Advent Calendar, Day 22: A whole bunch of Nancys

How does Nancy get her hair to do... that?

The beloved Comics Outta Context may be gone forever, but there is still at least one comics account on Twitter that has continued to delight me throughout 2024. Obviously, I'm referring to Nancy Comics by Ernie Bushmiller, maintained by the indispensable Johnny Callicutt. Each day, he will post panels or even full comic strips from the super-long-lived comic strip Nancy. What's great about the account is that it pulls from different eras -- from the early days when the strip was known as Fritzi Ritz and focused on Nancy's adult caretaker to the more recent strips written and drawn by Olivia James. But, as the name indicates, the focus is on Nancy's peak decades when the strip was done by the great Ernie Bushmiller (1905-1982).

The simplicity of Nancy makes it perfect for the kind of parodies I do, so here are a bunch of those all at once.

Saturday, December 21, 2024

2024 Comics Fun Advent Calendar, Day 21: A Pink Flamingos Christmas!

"It's going to be a lot different with a baby around."

As I've said in the past, I read about Ed Wood's movies long before I ever actually saw any of them. The same is true for John Waters' movies. Thanks to books like Cult Movies (1981) and Midnight Movies (1983), I'd read detailed descriptions of John's work, but the films themselves were difficult to access in suburban mid-Michigan in the 1990s. This was pre-streaming and pre-DVD. The internet was primitive in those days, too, but I eventually found someone in a newsgroup selling crude VHS bootlegs of the Waters movies. They were of abysmal quality, but they were better than nothing.

Today's nativity-themed comic adapts some memorable dialogue from Waters' most famous film, Pink Flamingos (1972). In the film, two lesbians, Merle (Jackie Sidel) and Etta (Pat LeFaiver), buy a baby on the black market from the villainous Marbles (Mink Stole and David Lochary) and name him Noodles. TRIVIA: The purloined baby is portrayed by Max Mueller, the real-life son of Pink Flamingos cast member Cookie Mueller. The baby's name is a punning reference to Mueller's Pasta, famous for its egg noodles.

Friday, December 20, 2024

2024 Comics Fun Advent Calendar, Day 20: The biggest traffic ticket I ever got

"I hope nobody notices my missing door!" is a weird thing to say out loud.

Let me tell you about the most expensive traffic ticket I ever received. 

It was the early 2000s and my sister Catherine had just moved to a small town outside Ft. Wayne, Indiana. I live a few hours away in Illinois, and I decided to make the journey to her house for Christmas by car even though I hate to drive and have zero sense of direction. Sure enough, I got badly lost several times on the way but finally arrived in Indiana, shaken but intact. I stayed (in a motel) for a couple days and tried to enjoy the holiday festivities, but I was dreading the trip back.

My fears were justified. When I got back on the highway and had been driving for maybe 30 or 40 minutes, I suddenly realized that it had been a while since I'd seen a posted speed limit sign. I had no idea what the speed limit was, so I just tried to keep pace with traffic. Well, around that time, I noticed a police car nearby and decided to slow down to 55 just to be on the safe side. The officer who ticketed me later said this was my big mistake, the thing that told him I was up to no good. He tailed me for several miles but then pulled off to the side of the highway. I thought he'd given up on me and was relieved. I should not have been.

I kept driving, still going about 55. A few minutes later, this cop came roaring back into traffic with his lights flashing and (to my memory) siren wailing. In my rearview mirror, I could see he was weaving through the cars trying to catch up to somebody. I assumed there was an emergency somewhere. Turns out, the emergency was me. When I pulled over, the police officer stepped out of his vehicle and approached my car, citation book in hand. He seemed to be in a bad mood. I knew I couldn't have been speeding, so what was my big crime? Expired tags.

Now, here is where my version of the story diverges from the cop's version of the story. According to the cop, I knew perfectly well that my tags were expired, and I had sneakily tried to avoid him so he wouldn't notice. He'd known from the start that I was doing something underhanded, but it had taken him a few minutes to figure out exactly what. That's why he'd pulled over the first time. Eventually, he cracked the case: I was a fiendish criminal mastermind who had knowingly tried to drive though the great state of Indiana with Illinois tags that had expired a few weeks previously.

My version of the story was that I'd recently changed apartments and had forgotten to forward my mail to my new place. Therefore, I hadn't gotten a reminder from the state of Illinois that my tags had expired at the end of November. Besides, it's not like I was hurting the state of Indiana. The officer did not believe my story at all and wrote me a substantial ticket, the largest I'd ever received. I was really strapped for cash in those days, so it stung. For the next decade and a half, I vowed never to drive in the state of Indiana again. When I wanted to visit my sister, I did so by Amtrak.


Thursday, December 19, 2024

2024 Comics Fun Advent Calendar, Day 19: Meanwhile on 'Three's Company'

She zinged you pretty good there, Stanley.

I was alive for the entire run of Three's Company from 1976 to 1984, but I didn't really watch the show until it was in syndicated reruns. It was one of those sitcoms that would be on every weekday after school. That puts it in the same basic category as The Brady Bunch and Happy Days. I didn't necessarily seek these shows out; I simply watched them because they were on TV. That's how it was in the pre-internet, pre-streaming days. Choice was barely a factor in entertainment. 

Looking back, I wonder what percentage of the jokes on Three's Company went sailing over my head. I'm pretty sure one episode was about a "call girl," and I had no idea what that term meant. I certainly could not have understood the many, many impotence jokes directed at poor, beleaguered Stanley Roper (Norman Fell) by his wife Helen (Audra Lindley). It's possible that Three's Company introduced me to a lot of risque topics.

Wednesday, December 18, 2024

Ed Wood Wednesdays, week 207: (Yet) Another Deep Dive into the Huffman Files

Emails! I get emails! I get stacks and stacks of emails!

In these strange, sad weeks following the death of my friend Greg Javer, I've found some comfort in the knowledge that Woodology—the study of Ed Wood's life and career—will carry on without him. It'll carry on without me someday, too. Greg was the most prominent contributor of material to this series, but he was far from the only one. Over the years, people like Bob Blackburn, James Pontolillo, Keith Crocker, W. Paul Apel, and Philip R. Frey have sent films, texts, photos and more my way. I'm grateful to all of you.

One of my more persistent emailers is a true zealot named Rob Huffman. He regularly supplies me with press clippings and other oddities that he's found in his research. Sometimes, I feel a little guilty that I can't always respond to his emails in a timely fashion. There are only so many hours in a day, you know? But I thought that you and I could go through some of Rob's recent finds together. How does that sound?

2024 Comics Fun Advent Calendar, Day 18: Have I posted this before?

I don't hate juice in real life.

I've been blogging for so long now, I have no real recollection of what I have and haven't posted to Dead 2 Rights. It's all a blur. But I was going through my archives recently and found this one that still made me laugh, so I'm posting it now. It's another one based on a tweet by Comics Outta Context. I have a bunch more of these. 

Here's another:

RIP Margaret Thatcher. Unless you didn't like her.
One more:
Okay, now I'm done.

Tuesday, December 17, 2024

2024 Comics Fun Advent Calendar, Day 17: The Elf on the Shelf Isn't Fun at Parties!

Don't be that guy.

Each family has its own Christmas traditions. Was The Elf in the Shelf a tradition in your home growing up? The book didn't come out until 2005, so it was way past my time. On the other hand, the Rankin-Bass Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer animated special premiered in 1964, so it should have been a major part of my childhood. But my dad didn't approve of that one for some reason. He didn't like the special's depiction of Santa Claus, I believe. So we rarely watched it. It doesn't pay to antagonize your parents at Christmas.

A Charlie Brown Christmas, Frosty the Snowman, and How the Grinch Stole Christmas were welcome in the Blevins household, however, as were such films as It's a Wonderful Life (1946) and various versions of A Christmas Carol. Again, though, my dad couldn't tolerate the musical version, Scrooge! (1970), so that one was was verboten. Even today, I'd feel guilty about watching it.

As for today's comic, it was another one written especially for this project. I don't really know much about The Elf on the Shelf, so I wrote him as a petty, pedantic jerk.

Monday, December 16, 2024

2024 Comics Fun Advent Calendar, Day 16: SQUAWK! SQUAWK!

We now enter the 9th Circus of Hell.

Just like Jim Davis' Garfield, Bil Keane's Family Circus is one of those long-running newspaper comic strips that has inspired dozens and dozens of parodies already. I've certainly done my share. Above is just one example. There's something about Family Circus that invites parody. It's so wholesome and old-fashioned and corny that, if you're a cynical person like me, you feel almost honor-bound to subvert it in some way. You want to drag it through the mud. That's what I'm doing here, turning a typical FC panel into some kind of mini horror movie.

 Here's another example, this one a bit more melancholy.

All dads must feel like this sometimes. Including yours. And mine.

And one last one before I go.

Out of the mouths of babes, huh?


Sunday, December 15, 2024

2024 Fun Comics Advent Calendar, Day 15: Fargield

Garfield is not here to amuse you.
 
Garfield parodies are, let's say, extremely common on the internet. This is another one. What can I say? I have a weakness for the classics. Jim Davis' comic strip has been running so long and has become so ubiquitous in our culture that it's only natural for people to want to subvert it somehow. That's just how people's minds work. Naturally, I've done some Garf-inspired stuff over the years, and not all of it has been posted to my blog. Here are a couple more examples:

His logic is airtight. Can't argue with that.
It's Garfield Lacking Garfield.

Okay, that last one is clearly inspired by Garfield Minus Garfield. I don't know if they've done that exact strip already, but I just wanted to do my own version. I just liked the image of the flea counter sitting on the countertop.

Saturday, December 14, 2024

2024 Comics Fun Advent Calendar, Day 14: CHEESE!

Show those pearly... uh, grays.

How's your Advent going? Mine's going okay, I guess. I haven't been religious in years. Maybe I never was. I went to church a lot as a kid, but it wasn't my idea. My mother was Catholic, which meant we were all Catholic. My dad didn't grow up in any particular religion, but he converted to Catholicism to marry my mom. Took classes and everything. I remember spending some of the most boring hours of my life at a church in Flushing called St. Robert Bellarmine. Mostly these were Sunday masses. But there are a few extra holy days scattered throughout the year when you have to go to church on, like, a Tuesday night or something.  

I remember that one of these extra masses happened the very same night the George C. Scott version of A Christmas Carol was airing on TV. I didn't want to miss any of it, so I was extremely anxious for that mass to end. If I recall correctly, we got home just as the movie was starting, so I didn't miss much or any of it, thank God. The ghoulish looking fellow in today's comic reminds me a bit of the ghost of Jacob Marley. This is yet another comic panel I found through Comics Outta Context and repurposed.

P.S. Has a professional photographer ever told you to say "cheese"? Is that something that happens in real life?

Thursday, December 12, 2024

2024 Comics Fun Advent Calendar, Day 12: Another Batman one already? Yes!

What can I say? I watch a lot of Batman.

Most of the comics and cartoons I've used in this series have been oldies. I've had them saved to my hard drive for a while and just wanted to post them to this blog for posterity before deleting them from my computer. But today's cartoon is brand new and written especially for this project. A couple of days ago, I saw an ad for a Batman Unmasked action figure and thought, "What if Bruce Wayne walked around looking like that? Would Commissioner Gordon finally figure it out?" Honestly, he might not figure it out even then. Neil Hamilton's version of the character is a pretty dim bulb.

Wednesday, December 11, 2024

Ed Wood Wednesdays, week 206: Greg Javer (1968-2024)

"The bell has rung on his great career."

"Where's Greg?"

That is the question I've gotten most frequently over the last year and a half from readers of this blog. The remarkable Greg Javer, a soft-spoken Pennsylvanian who often wrote under the name Greg Dziawer, contributed a great deal of material to this series from 2015 to 2023. He started out with numerous Ed Wood Wednesdays articles before eventually launching his own series of YouTube videos called The Ed Wood Summit Podcast. His interests were wide-ranging, even within the seemingly limited field of Woodology. He was just as likely to cover Eddie's childhood in Poughkeepsie as he was to discuss Ed's pornographic loops of the 1970s.

He was, in short, a major player in the world of Wood research and a significant presence on this blog for eight years. He was also my friend, someone I just loved talking to and working with on various projects. Then, about midway through last year, he vanished. The articles stopped. The videos stopped. Even the emails (for the most part) stopped. Where had he gone, people wondered? I am not one to pry, so I didn't. I'd occasionally hear rumors that he had other matters—perhaps personal, perhaps professional—to attend to. I trusted that he'd eventually find his way back into this strange, little world and would contact me when he was ready to start anew. It just never happened.

On Sunday, December 1, 2024, we finally received a definitive answer about what had happened to Greg, and the news could not have been worse. Not long after receiving a devastating cancer diagnosis, he died at the far-too-young age of 56, leaving behind a daughter, Elyse Rosario, and his partner of 18 years, Jennifer "Kitten" Rosario. I can't help but think how he only outlived Ed Wood by two years (Eddie died at 54 in 1978) and that both men were claimed in the month of December. I wonder if those same thoughts occurred to Greg in his final days.

I asked Jennifer to say a few words in remembrance of Greg, and here is how she responded:
A passionate admirer of Ed Wood Jr., he combined his love of film with his dedication to research and writing, leaving his mark as a contributing author. He found joy in life’s simple pleasures—reading, spending time with family, and delving into thought-provoking documentaries. One thing I want to note is that he considered all of you real friends. I could log into his Gmail right now and find numerous emails of people checking in on him, along with text messages. I can't make every name, but everyone he has worked with since the start of this Ed Wood Jr. journey would fall under this umbrella, at least 10 years or more.  He would tell me a story or something that was found, and it always started with "my buddy ____" or "my friend ___." And I know he cherished each and every friendship made along the way.

Rob Huffman has started a GoFundMe to cover some of Greg's final expenses. The proceeds will go directly to Jennifer and Elyse. Please consider donating. Every little bit helps, as they say. And, if you can't afford it, please forward the link to others on social media so that they can donate. It's the least we can do, considering all Greg did for us.

2024 Fun Comics Advent Calendar, Day 11: Tina and the Comedy Factory

I just noticed that I never actually mentioned Tina Fey's last name in this comic. Whoops!

This was originally going to be a much longer piece. I had planned to do the complete ending scene from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory with Lorne Michaels as Willy Wonka and Tina Fey as Charlie Bucket. I even had dreams of selling it to a humor website for $50 or so. But as I got further into it, I realized my plan wouldn't be practical and that no editor would buy it anyway. So I just kind of bailed on it after a few panels. Those panels are visible above. I think this is about as good as it was ever going to be. Sorry or you're welcome, I don't know which.

Tuesday, December 10, 2024

Podcast Tuesday: "Oy, Canada!"

Fonzie (Henry Winkler, right) confronts a villain on The Fonz and the Happy Days Gang.

Cartoons are educational! And I don't just mean the ones that are trying to be, like The Magic School Bus or Tennessee Tuxedo. I mean pretty much all the cartoons we grew up on, including Looney Tunes and the collected works of Hanna-Barbera. Like it or not, you did learn some stuff while watching those, if only through osmosis. Looking back, we were introduced to classical music, opera, and even important names and events from history while watching the adventures of Bugs, Daffy, and the rest.

But it goes beyond that. Cartoons have also served as a great museum of show business history. Long before I knew who Peter Lorre, Jimmy Durante, Mae West, and Humphrey Bogart were, I'd seen parodies of them in old cartoons. And it's through cartoons that I was introduced to the trope of the top-hat-wearing, mustache-twirling villain. Characters like these appeared in silent films of the 1910s but trace their lineage back to stage melodramas of the 1840s and 1850s! So latter-day cartoon characters such as Snidely Whiplash and Dick Dastardly have quite a heritage.

This week on These Days Are Ours: A Happy Days Podcast, we review an episode called "Perilous Pauline" that takes place in the late 1800s in Canada. It draws on both the silent films and the stage melodramas I mentioned earlier. But is it any fun? Let's find out together, huh?

2024 Comics Fun Advent Calendar, Day 10: Elsewhere in the Green Lantern-verse


You know Green Lantern, right? The muscly, masked dude in green who flies around and wears a power ring that he has to charge occasionally? Yeah, that guy. I'd say he's up there in the pantheon of superheroes. He's not in Superman or Batman territory, though. Like, Superman and Batman were on Super Friends right from the beginning, but it took a few seasons before GL joined. And he did eventually get a movie, but it didn't do well, and they didn't make any more. He had a TV show, too, but it only lasted 26 episodes.

Just like Superman and Batman have their own supporting characters, some of whom are popular enough to merit spinoffs across multiple media, Green Lantern has his own colorful repertory company. Today's comic spotlights the Guardians of the Universe, a council of wise, immortal aliens who (I think) mainly sit around in a semi-circle and have meetings. I saw a picture of them somewhere on social media and decided to turn it into a little slapstick adventure. Oh, and the sound effects panel is yellow because... well, if you know, you know.
 
Before we leave the topic of Green Lantern, here's a picture of him just lounging on a pile of pillows in Stewie Griffin's room.

Welcome to pillow world, Bri!

Monday, December 9, 2024

2024 Comics Fun Advent Calendar, Day 9: Joy to the world! Your God is dead!

Did you find all six differences?


What's the holiday season without a little harmless blasphemy, huh? Relax. God's got a sense of humor about these things, I'm sure of it.

Today, we pay backhanded tribute to cartoonist Henry Boltinoff (1914-2001), who worked for decades in both comic strips and books. He's what you'd call a journeyman. His magnum opus, however, may be a long-running newspaper feature called Hocus Focus in which he would present two seemingly identical versions of a cartoon and ask us, the readers, to spot six obscure differences between them. I used to pore over such puzzles as a kid, though I never got good at finding the differences.

"Find all six differences" cartoons are still fairly common even today. You'll see them in Slylock Fox on a regular basis, for instance, and they're still used as filler in newspapers, newsletters, and fliers. Recently, at the office complex where I work, there was a cartoon like this projected on a monitor across from the elevators. I suppose it was there to keep people entertained while they waited.

I decided to take one of Henry's rather innocent cartoons from 1959 (plucked from Comics Outta Context) and take it in a darker direction. Or maybe Henry's cartoon wasn't so innocent! Obviously, these college students from 1959 are pretty square looking, but one of them is concerned enough about the state of the world that he worries the new year will not arrive. Can you sympathize with him? I can.

Sunday, December 8, 2024

2024 Comics Fun Advent Calendar, Day 8: In the Malph of Madness

Here, we see how comedy is subjective.

What, you thought we were getting through this without some Happy Days content? If you've been following this blog at all for the last few years, you know that I've been the co-host of a Happy Days podcast since 2018. We're currently making our way through an early '80s animated spinoff of the long-running sitcom called The Fonz and the Happy Days Gang

On the cartoon version of Happy Days, Don Most reprises his role as Ralph Malph and is there to serve a few basic functions, namely to be the show's resident coward (a la Shaggy from Scooby-Doo) and to crack corny jokes. Rest assured, he does plenty of both. His "comedy" tends to provoke groans from his friends and outright anger from his enemies. The latter is depicted above. The angry fellow in the middle is again something I found through Comics Outta Context. Anyone know who he was or where he originally appeared?

Saturday, December 7, 2024

2024 Comics Fun Advent Calendar, Day 7: In which I get annoyingly artsy

Any minute now.

Like I said at the beginning of this series, I've been a comics fan almost my entire life. I was introduced to the medium at a very early age through newspaper comic strips, with Beetle Bailey, Peanuts, Hagar the Horrible, Hi & Lois, and the formidable Bloom County being among my favorites. My love of "sequential art" deepened as I discovered Marvel and DC, mainly through "spinner racks" of cheap comic books at the local drug store. (Was the original Crisis on Infinite Earths a major part of your childhood, too? How about the Ambush Bug miniseries? Spider-Man's costume change?)

It wasn't really until my late teens, however, that I discovered the weirder, edgier, darker side of comics. First, there was the documentary Crumb (1994). Then there were the graphic novels I discovered in the college library. I would spend hours poring over those, plus Art Spiegelman's anthology RAW. And my trusty guidebook was Scott McCloud's seminal Understanding Comics (1993). I think the comic strip above is my attempt at doing something McCloud-ish that plays with the medium of comics, using repeated panels to suggest the passage of time. The artwork is again cribbed from the much-missed Comics Outta Context Twitter account.

Friday, December 6, 2024

2024 Comics Fun Advent Calendar, Day 6: Alice in Somethingland

They totally ripped off that Tom Petty video.

Have you ever heard a good answer to the Mad Hatter's famous riddle about why a raven is like a writing desk? Of the explanations I've heard, the one I like best is that Poe wrote on both of them. (He wrote about a raven while literally writing on a desk. Get it?) But even that didn't satisfy me, so I scripted the vignette you see above. Actually, this little comic was my way of reusing some famous artwork by Sir John Tenniel (1820-1914). In particular, I like the expression he gave Alice here. You can tell she's just about had it with the Hatter.

Thursday, December 5, 2024

2024 Comics Fun Advent Calendar, Day 5: The Silver Surfer crossover you didn't know you needed!

Filmed not too far from where I live!

There used to be a great Twitter account called Comics Outta Context that would regularly post random panels from old comic books, mainly DC and Marvel. I'd often use these tweets as the basis for comics of my own. That account is long gone, but I held on to some of the parodies I did, like the one you see above. I think a lot of the comics I'm going to post this month with come from that same stash.

By the way, if you happen to run into the person who ran the Comics Outta Context account, tell him (or her) to drop me a line.

Wednesday, December 4, 2024

Ed Wood Wednesdays, week 205: 'Ed Wood, Secret Agent' (2013)

You can almost hear the theme song, can't you?

NOTE: We lost someone very special this week. On Sunday, December 1, 2024, Greg Javer, aka Greg Dziawer, died unexpectedly of cancer. I'd known of his illness but not that he was terminal, so this news came as a great and horrible shock. Greg wrote many articles for this blog, and we also recorded numerous episodes of The Ed Wood Summit Podcast together. I considered Greg a good friend, and he was extremely generous with his research. A proper tribute to him will appear on this blog once I have all the facts assembled. 

This week, I'd simply like to share a story by author Colin Schmidt that appeared in, of all places, an Australian Dr. Who newsletter in 2013. It imagines Ed Wood as a Mission: Impossible-type secret agent, with Criswell, Tor Johnson, and Bela Lugosi as his teammates. This story was sent to my email account by someone who was looking for Greg! I dutifully forwarded it on to Greg, but he never rendered an opinion on it. I'm pretty sure he would have enjoyed it, though, and I'm pretty sure you will, too.  J.B.

2024 Comics Fun Advent Calendar, Day 4: The Adventures of Batman & Robin

What, you think superheroes are oblivious to name-calling?

For the first few years of my life (1975-1981), my family lived in a little ranch-style house in a cozy little neighborhood in Flint, Michigan, right down the street from my rambunctious Uncle John and his family. I've retained quite a few memories from those days, and some of the fondest revolve around Channel 20, a local independent UHF station we used to watch quite a lot. It showed mostly (or all?) reruns back then. Typical offerings included Lost in Space, The Adventures of Superman, The Abbott & Costello Show, and, best of all, Batman.

Thanks to MeTV, I've gotten to revisit Batman in recent years, and the series and its characters have again taken up residence in my imagination. Hence the terribly-drawn comic above. Please forgive me for it.

Tuesday, December 3, 2024

2024 Comics Fun Advent Calendar, Day 3: The monster cereals are always in season!

I've never had any Carmella Creeper. Is it good?

I never had any of General Mills' monster cereals as a child. My parents just wouldn't go for it. Frosted Flakes and Apple Jacks were okay, but Franken Berry and Frute Brute were out of the question. I remember seeing a box of Count Chocula at a friend's house once and being consumed with both fascination and jealousy. I finally got to have them as an adult. By then, according to those who know, the recipes had been changed (for health reasons) and the cereals weren't as good as they used to be. They tasted fine to me. Maybe it's a good thing I never had any of those cereals in their '70s and '80s heyday. I might still be chasing an impossible Boo Berry high from when I was seven.

Anyway, the comic above was written back in October but I'm just sharing it now. Maybe, in this context, it's Advent and not Halloween that arouses Carmella Creeper.

Monday, December 2, 2024

2024 Comics Fun Advent Calendar, Day 2: "The Next Ten Commandments"

I liked the detail of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers.

I grew up Catholic and spent many hours of my life (through no choice of my own) at a church called St. Robert Bellarmine in Flushing, Michigan. It was a very plain, almost barn-like structure when my family started going there in the early 1980s, but the parishioners raised money and made improvements to it over the years. Eventually, it became a pretty impressive place of worship. I mean, it won't put any cathedrals to shame, but for a church in a smallish Midwestern town, it's not bad.

One of the most prominent additions to the main sacristy was a series of stained-glass windows depicting scenes from the Bible. I generally didn't have much interest in what the priest was saying, so I'd stare at those windows, one of which depicted Moses reading the Ten Commandments. I suppose that memory stayed with me and eventually inspired today's comic.

The last time I ever set foot in St. Robert Bellarmine was in August 2018 for my father's funeral. The place looked better than ever.

Sunday, December 1, 2024

2024 Comics Fun Advent Calendar, Day 1: Meanwhile, on the Starship Enterprise...

Captain Kirk and Mr. Spock (both Jewish!)

Two Decembers ago, I posted a series on this blog called The 2022 Ed-Vent Calendar. It was 25 continuous days of brief, bite-size articles about Ed Wood, his life, and his films. The idea was to do the blogging equivalent of an advent calendar: lots of little presents instead of one big one. I think my modest experiment yielded some fun results, and I wanted to try something similar but not exactly the same this year.

A Heathcliff parody.
Many people think that this blog is only about Ed Wood, and that's admittedly a fair conclusion to draw. There is a lot of content about Eddie on this site. But it's not the only thing I do! If you go to the Dead 2 Rights main page, for instance, you'll see the logo at the top, and underneath it are several clickable labels: Ed Wood Wednesdays, Happy Days, Comedy Classics, Comics Fun!, and Best of D2R. Notice how Eddie is only one of those.

This December, I wanted to shine some light on the oft-neglected Comics Fun! part of the blog. What is this? Well, I've been obsessed with comics and cartoons from early childhood, and I've been making them since I was able to hold a crayon. In junior high and high school, I used to draw silly little cartoons on notebook paper and pass them around in class, much to the annoyance of my teachers. My characters included Iffy the Troll, The Apple Scruffs, Margin Man, and an unfortunate family called The Melties who were all made from wax and yet who insisted on going outside on sunny days.

Unfortunately, I've had basically no art training apart from what I got in elementary school, and my drawing skills are minimal to nonexistent. My handwriting is a complete disgrace, and it's rare for me to draw anything with pens or pencils on actual paper these days. But I still want to make comics and cartoons. So my usual method is to patch it together from photos and artwork I've found on the internet. Occasionally, I'll take an existing comic strip and merely change the dialogue or the caption. If the artwork I want simply doesn't exist, I'll "draw" it very crudely in Microsoft Paint. (Yes, Microsoft Paint!)

After years of posting this material on the internet, I've learned that people do not enjoy my comics very much. Their typical reactions range from total indifference to mild dislike. A few years ago, I submitted some of what I considered my "best stuff" to an editor once and received a swift but polite rejection. And yet, I keep creating this material. Why? Because I find it funny. This is stuff that amuses me. These dumb, poorly-made comics and cartoons keep accumulating on my hard drive, and I can't bring myself to throw them away.

And so, until Christmas 2024 finally arrives, I will be sharing some homemade comics each day with my readers. That comic strip at the top is the first example. Basically, I saw a screenshot of a Star Trek video game that had been posted to Facebook, and I turned it into a little tragicomic saga about Kirk and Spock's working relationship. Enjoy or don't. Totally up to you.

Wednesday, November 27, 2024

Ed Wood Wednesdays, week 204: The unveiling of Ed Wood's historical marker

A glimpse at the unveiling of Ed Wood's historical marker.

Since Thanksgiving is approaching and most Americans are preoccupied with travel, relatives, decorating, shopping, and food—or possibly all of theseI thought I'd keep it especially light and informal this week. So no big Ed Wood revelations or in-depth Ed Wood reviews, okay? Let's just have a little Ed Wood fun.

Pretty in pink?
Last Wednesday, I told you about how a New York State historical marker was being placed in front of Ed Wood's childhood home at 35 Delano Street in Poughkeepsie, thanks to the efforts of some high school students in teacher Robert McHugh's AP history class in Dutchess County. Those enterprising youngsters cited this very blog in their application to a nonprofit organization called the William G. Pomeroy Foundation, which seeks to denote places of historical significance in the state of New York. 

And, after two years, it worked! The Foundation agreed to mark Eddie's former home with a permanent, bright blue-and-yellow sign. Anyone who walks or drives by 35 Delano Street will know that this was once the home of the director of Glen or Glenda (1953). None of this could have happened without the research of such esteemed Woodologists as Greg Dziawer and James Pontolillo, both of whom have made invaluable contributions to this blog.

I couldn't be there for the unveiling of the sign, unfortunately, but I did write a speech for the occasion. That speech was delivered for me by director and film programmer Katie Cokinos. You can view a gallery of photos from the event right here. In some of the pictures, you can see that the marker was hidden under a pink cloth before it was revealed. To my eyes, at least from a distance, the sign appears to be wearing its very own pink angora sweater! What could be more appropriate?

A 16-minute video of the unveiling ceremony has also been posted to Instagram for those who would care to watch it. It includes Katie's speech, if that's a selling point. You'll really get a sense of how charming this building on Delano Street truly is. This is some old-school construction, and it has a lot more personality than the soulless architecture we see today. I'd be proud to live in a place like this. 

Before we leave this topic in the rearview mirror, I'd like to share an email I received from Katie the day after the unveiling:
Hi Joe,

What an amazing event! Ed Wood’s birthplace, 35 Delano (as in Franklin Delano Roosevelt), around the corner from the Bardavon Theater, the house is owned by Roberto Rossi whose family has a deli, Rossi and Sons, a block away. Robert McHugh, history teacher at Arlington High School, organized the memorial and event along with his students. And your wonderful, inspiring, informative tribute got a rousing applause. Love that this happened during his 100th year. I felt Edward Davis Wood Jr. smiling.

Thank you for participating albeit through your writing,
I only wish I could have been there in person!

Tuesday, November 26, 2024

Podcast Tuesday: "Rome (If You Want To)"

Fonzie (Henry Winkler) enjoys Rome.

If you were doing a time travel show and had all of history to play with, where would you send your characters? Caveman times? The far future? Ancient Egypt? The Old West? Hanna-Barbera's animated series The Fonz and the Happy Days Gang (1980-81) did all of those and more in its first season. It took until Season 2, however, before Fonzie (Henry Winkler) and his pals finally got to Ancient Rome.

This week on These Days Are Ours: A Happy Days Podcast, we're talking about that episode, "There's No Place Like Rome." It features most of what you'd expect: togas, lions, chariots, centurions, a colosseum, etc. You want men in skirts? You got 'em. Speaking of which, the show has used real historical figures occasionally, including Cleopatra, but this time they substitute a fictional character called Julius Maximus for Julius Caesar. The plot of "No Place" has Maximus trying to conquer some unnamed walled city and marry the king's daughter against her will. Naturally, his plans go up in smoke when Fonzie and friends arrive in their flying time machine.

Does this episode get a thumbs up or a thumbs down? Find out below.

Wednesday, November 20, 2024

Ed Wood Wednesdays, week 203: The saga of Ed Wood's historical marker

This house on Delano Street in Poughkeepsie was once Ed Wood's home.

And the year of Ed Wood continues! The 100th anniversary of Eddie's birth has brought with it many marvelous surprises, including some recognition from the director's home state of New York. On Wednesday, November 20, 2024, an official historical marker is being placed at 35 Delano Street in Poughkeepsie, New York to denote it as Ed Wood's childhood home. Amazingly, this blog played some small role in that achievement.

In June 2024, I received this intriguing email from a man named Robert McHugh:
I am a teacher near Poughkeepsie and for the past couple of years I have had my students apply for funding for historic markers for sites in Dutchess County. This year, one group of students decided to try for a marker about Ed Wood. They used some of the material from your sitethe reference to the wedding announcement of his parents in the Kingston paper was especially helpful—as part of the grant application. 
Good news: they were successful and there is now a historic marker being made that will likely be installed sometime over the next few months. (It takes quite a while to fabricate them; I don't know if we will have it by October 10 for his birthday.) It's going to go in front of one of the homes he lived in, at 35 Delano St. 
I'm not sure if you happen to live anywhere near Poughkeepsie, but we would love to invite you to the unveiling, whenever that would be. 
Thanks for posting all that great information about him online.
I thanked Robert for the email and gave due credit to Greg Dziawer, who has written extensively about Ed Wood's early life in Poughkeepsie for this blog. Greg, in turn, has credited the formidable James Pontolillo for his tireless (and ongoing!) research into Ed's New York years. Unfortunately, since I live in the suburbs of Chicago and work full time, I had to tell Robert that attending the unveiling of the marker was not possible.

In October, Robert gave me an exciting update: "The Ed Wood marker has finally been made. Now we have to figure out how to install it and think about an unveiling ceremony." In assembling the ceremony, Robert reached out to director and film programmer Katie Cokinos, who organized the special screening of Ed Wood (1994) that I attended virtually on Ed's 100th birthday last month. Knowing I would be unable to be there in person, Katie very nicely asked me to write a speech for the occasion. Here is that speech:
Ladies and gentlemen:

We are gathered here on this wonderful occasion to honor the memory of a man who received very little recognition in his own lifetime. Edward Davis Wood, Jr. was born in Poughkeepsie, New York on October 10, 1924 and became enamored of show business and the movies at a young age. He even worked as an usher at the Bardavon Theater on Market Street. I can imagine he spent many hours in that place, staring up at the screen and gazing in amazement at the larger-than-life figures projected there. He especially loved the cowboy stars, like Buck Jones, and of course the great horror icon Bela Lugosi.

For many of us, that's where the journey would end. We're content just to watch the screen and to live vicariously through other people's stories. We still do that today, except the screens have gotten much smaller and we can carry them in our pockets. But that wasn't enough for our Eddie. He didn't just want to watch other people's adventures. He wanted to have adventures of his own. That instinct led him, after a stint in the Marines during World War II, to Hollywood in the late 1940s.
 
Heed the words of Lyle Talbot.
Once on the West Coast, Ed Wood did everything he could to make his mark as a writer, director, and producer of motion pictures. And that's not all! He acted on both stage and screen, made TV commercials and pilots, and penned countless novels, short stories, and magazine articles. There seemed to be no end to his creativity or his ambition. Along the way, he attempted just about every kind of story there is: science-fiction, horror, Westerns, and even crime thrillers. He may never have gotten to work with Buck Jones, but he did work extensively with Bela Lugosi and even befriended the great horror icon. Bela wound up appearing in all three of Ed's most famous films: GLEN OR GLENDA, BRIDE OF THE MONSTER, and the infamous PLAN 9 FROM OUTER SPACE.

During his own, rather short time on this earth, Ed Wood received very little praise or recognition from the entertainment industry. He wasn't getting positive reviews in the press or awards from his colleagues. To the extent that Ed's films were noticed at all, they were mocked and derided for their low budgets, unlikely dialogue, and outrageous storylines. And yet, his quirky, memorable films have struck a nerve with fans for decades, and those fans have kept Eddie's memory alive long after his death in 1978. This year alone , the 100th anniversary of Ed Wood's birth, there have been at least three major new books about him, and his films continue to be shown in theaters across the country and re-released for home viewing as well.

And now, we place this marker at Ed Wood's childhood home. I am certain that Eddie would be flattered and thrilled by this honor. And if there is anything we can learn from his life, it's that we shouldn't be content to sit on the sidelines and watch other people do all the exciting things we wish we could do ourselves. As Lyle Talbot says in GLEN OR GLENDA, "We only have one life to live. We throw that one away, what is there left?"
I don't know if Katie will actually deliver that speech at the ceremony, but it was so nice to be asked. As for the marker, here is what it will look like. Perhaps, if you live near Poughkeepsie, you can stop by 35 Delano Street and see it for yourself someday.

This handsome blue and yellow marker stands as a tribute to Ed Wood.

Wednesday, November 13, 2024

Ed Wood Wednesdays, week 202: Kathy Wood gives her side of the story

Kathy Wood, seen here with her dog McGinty in 1988, was married to Ed for over twenty years. 

Bob Blackburn's recently-published book, Kathy Wood & I: How I Fell Down the Ed Wood Jr. Rabbit Hole (Bear Manor Media, 2024), documents the author's decade-plus friendship with Ed Wood's widow, Kathleen O'Hara Everett Wood (1922-2006). Bob approached the publicity-shy Kathy shortly after attending a marathon of Wood's movies in 1992 and, after a few false starts, slowly but surely gained her trust. Bob remained her pal and confidant until Kathy's death in 2006.

Kathy's late husband started becoming more well-known during these years, largely because of Rudolph Grey's oral history, Nightmare of Ecstasy: The Life and Art of Edward D. Wood Jr. (1992). That book was adapted into a lavish, star-studded biopic called Ed Wood (1994) by director Tim Burton, with Johnny Depp in the title role and Patricia Arquette playing Kathy. The publicity generated by Burton's movie led to some home video rereleases of Ed's vintage films and a smattering of documentaries, TV specials, and articles about the infamous director and his career. A radio industry professional himself and the son of a popular sportscaster, Bob Blackburn was there to serve as Kathy's guide through these unlikely events.

As a bonus, Kathy Wood & I includes a letter that Kathy drafted in 1998 and submitted to a Los Angeles probate court as part of a dispute over Ed Wood's estate. Her purpose in writing it was to demonstrate that she was Ed's partner, not just his wife. I didn't mention any of this in my review of the book last week, but I thought Kathy's letter deserved some extra attention, as it's really the closest thing to an autobiography she ever wrote. It also offers a fascinating glimpse into Ed Wood's private life that we won't get anywhere else.

A Canadian who relocated to Los Angeles in 1954 for professional reasons, Kathy O'Hara Everett first spotted Edward Davis Wood, Jr. in 1955 when they both started attending meetings of the Church of Religious Science at the Wiltern Theatre. Kathy considered Ed quite handsome but noticed he was always alone at these lectures. They finally met a few months later when a down-on-his luck Eddie approached Kathy at a Hollywood night spot called The Cameo Room. They remained a couple for the rest of Ed's life, eloping to Las Vegas in 1956 and staying married for 22 years.

"Life with Eddie wasn't a bed of roses," Kathy writes, "and I paid dearly for loving and standing by him." This sentence serves as a thesis statement for the entire letter.

Kathy Wood helped write this scene.
By the time he met Kathy, Ed was 31 and had already made Glen or Glenda (1953), Jail Bait (1954), and Bride of the Monster (1955), but his most famous film, Plan 9 from Outer Space (1957), was still on the horizon. The creation of that now-classic sci-fi film is a big part of Kathy's letter. She served as Ed's typist and creative consultant on the script, as she details:
It was during this time that Eddie started writing Plan Nine from Outer Space (Grave Robbers From Outer Space). We spent many hours discussing the story and dialogue and the plot. I helped him with my ideas and typed a large part of the script as usual. It was a happy time and a crazy time. [...] Ed and I kept working on the Grave Robbers script, both of us throwing lines back and forth to each other. I remember one Sunday afternoon we were both stumped for some kind of horrific bomb. I grabbed our Bible and was reading it when some certain passage came to mind. Something about the powers of the sun (or the "Solarnite" bomb in the script). We had a lot of fun talking ideas back and forth on the script.
I've heard Kathy tell similar stories in documentaries about her husband, and I feel that the Bible passage she is referencing must be Revelation 16:8-9, which states: "The fourth angel poured out his bowl on the sun, and the sun was allowed to scorch people with fire. They were seared by the intense heat and they cursed the name of God, who had control over these plagues, but they refused to repent and glorify him." Let's face it, if there's a book of the Bible that would have appealed to Eddie, it's Revelation, with its often surreal, grotesque, apocalyptic imagery.

For the most part, Kathy's letter describes her often chaotic domestic life with Ed Wood. Surprisingly, there were many good times along the way—pool parties, vacations, nights on the town. The Woods were social animals, and their circle of friends included many of the kooky characters we know from Ed's movies: Duke Moore, David De Mering, Bunny Breckinridge, Tor and Karl Johnson, Kenne Duncan, Dudley Manlove, and Paul Marco. These folks often did what they could to save Ed from impending doom, but occasionally, they couldn't even save themselves. That's life in Hollywood for you. It seems Ed and Kathy could never hold onto a residence or a vehicle for long, and Kathy's letter is full of  stories of disputes with various landlords, including Plan 9 investor Ed Reynolds.

Money, or the lack of it, became the dominant issue in the Woods' lives. (Isn't that true for most of us?) While Kathy worked as a secretary and stenographer at various companies, including Muzak, Eddie's career as a writer-director was unreliable at best. He'd sell a screenplay or a novel, but the money would soon be gone. She also claims that some of Steve Apostolof's checks to Eddie bounced, which may explain her longstanding resentment toward the director-producer and his "cheap girly movies." Kathy does not dwell on Eddie's raging alcoholism, even though it was the chief cause of his professional decline and early death. As Kathy sees it, the drinking was just part of the problem, along with Eddie's "cranky" moods and his consumption of salty foods.

Every Ed Wood fan knows how this sordid story ends. In December 1978, the Woods were evicted from their Yucca St. apartment by the local sheriff and had to move in with actor Peter Coe. They'd undergone similar trials in the past, even rooming with Duke Moore in his one-bedroom unit for a while, but this final disgrace proved too much for Eddie. He died heartbroken—literally and figuratively—on December 10, 1978, at the age of 54. Kathy's letter comes to an abrupt conclusion here: "Our world had ended." There's no redemption arc, no deus ex machina, just loss and despair. She does not mention Ed's posthumous, ironic fame.

And yet, Kathy's letter is not merely an exercise in misery. She clearly had a lot of fond memories of her late husband, and that comes through in her writing about their marriage. She relates a bittersweet anecdote about the time Eddie tried (unsuccessfully) to nurse an injured bird back to health, for instance. She also remembers the way he kept her and a neighborhood child enraptured for hours with his action-packed and largely fabricated World War II stories. That child, Tim Brockman, grew up to be a helicopter pilot in the Vietnam War.

Above all, through this letter, we get little glimpses of Ed Wood in his prime, back when he was still the life of the party. You can almost see why Kathy stuck by him for so many years, possibly hoping the old spark would somehow return. As it says on Kathy's grave: "She hitched her wagon to a star."
Kathy Wood and I: How I Fell Down the Angora Rabbit Hole is available in hardcover, paperback, and Kindle editions right here. Or you can purchase it directly from the publisher.